{"id":2392,"date":"2014-09-01T12:34:33","date_gmt":"2014-09-01T12:34:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/marniepehrson.com\/unplugged\/?p=2392"},"modified":"2014-09-01T13:03:59","modified_gmt":"2014-09-01T13:03:59","slug":"beware-of-the-first-thing-that-comes-along","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marniekuhns.com\/unplugged\/2014\/09\/01\/beware-of-the-first-thing-that-comes-along\/","title":{"rendered":"Beware of the First Thing That Comes Along"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When one begins creating a better life, she must often let go of what isn&#8217;t working in order to make room for what will. But beware of the first or second thing that comes along to fill the void.<\/p>\n<p>If you&#8217;ve studied the power of thought on your life\u2019s circumstances, you know to envision\u00a0how your\u00a0ideal life will look, feel and be. You visualize it with such certainty it feels almost tangible to you, an eventuality, not just a hope or dream for the future. It\u2019s a legitimate\u00a0creation waiting to be delivered in the timeline of your life. You believe that there\u2019s this point in the future where everything is destined to fall into place in a magical, perfect way.<strong> It&#8217;s like having placed an order on Amazon and awaiting\u00a0the\u00a0eventual delivery of your package.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You\u2019re convinced it\u2019s just around the corner, this magical life. You look around and you see few indications of it in reality, yet you know deep in your heart that it exists, that it\u2019s waiting for you. You\u2019re not really sure what the wait is about, but you keep holding hope.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Then something or someone comes along that looks like a piece to your vision.<\/strong> This thing, person or opportunity seems to fit so nicely into your picture, that you impulsively grab hold of it and welcome it into your life. <strong>In your zealousness to inherit your dream, you make compromises.<\/strong> You fill in gaps with your imagination \u2013 making this person, thing, or opportunity more than it really is.<\/p>\n<p>You settle for less than you originally desired because this thing that came along is 70% or 80% of what you\u2019re looking for. Hopefully, things won\u2019t work out. That person or thing will leave your life. Yes, that exit can be painful. Yet, <strong>it would be better for things not to work out than for you to settle long term for that which is less than you desire.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>I have discovered that the first thing that comes along is rarely \u201cit.\u201d<\/strong> The second thing that comes along probably isn&#8217;t \u201cit\u201d either.<\/p>\n<p>Why, when you&#8217;ve been so clear in your vision, do you keep attracting things that are \u201cclose but no cigar?\u201d I believe it happens for at least two reasons:<\/p>\n<p><strong>1)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You\u2019re not as clear as you thought you were, and this is a chance to clarify further.<\/strong> Until you \u201ctry on\u201d a few possibilities, you don\u2019t really know what you want. As you do, you further define what you\u2019re looking for and what you won\u2019t settle for.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2)\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 There\u2019s something in the situation you need to learn about yourself.<\/strong> You need to grow some more.<\/p>\n<p>When you formulate a big dream, you are not the person capable of receiving that dream \u2013 at least not yet. You have to grow into the dream. If you were ready for it at inception, you\u2019d already have it. The dream wouldn&#8217;t feel so \u201cbig,\u201d rather it would feel more like a next step.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/marniepehrson.com\/unplugged\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/dontsettle.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-2398\" src=\"http:\/\/marniepehrson.com\/unplugged\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/dontsettle-300x218.jpg\" alt=\"you didn't come this far or fight this hard to settle\" width=\"300\" height=\"218\" srcset=\"https:\/\/marniekuhns.com\/unplugged\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/dontsettle-300x218.jpg 300w, https:\/\/marniekuhns.com\/unplugged\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/dontsettle.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a>This process of growing into a dream takes time and experience learning about ourselves and what needs to change in us. <strong>Sometimes the things or people that come our way aren&#8217;t part of our dream, but part of our &#8220;becoming process.&#8221;<\/strong> They are key ingredients in our personal growth journey that make us capable of receiving the ultimate vision.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Think twice before you settle for the first or second thing that comes along.<\/strong> Don\u2019t settle. But don\u2019t be afraid to tweak and change your vision. There could be something even better for you, and it may look different than you originally envisioned.<\/p>\n<p><strong>There is a difference between fine tuning your vision and settling.<\/strong> If you find yourself saying, \u201cI\u2019m willing to put up with this in order to get that,\u201d note the red flag. Don\u2019t build things into your life that you have to \u201cput up with.\u201d Sure, no one\u2019s perfect; everyone has flaws. No situation is ideal. \u00a0But beware of times when you know going in that you\u2019re going to have to \u201cput up with something.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s a sign you\u2019re settling. Learn what you need to from this situation, but hold out for a better fit.<\/p>\n<p><strong>You didn&#8217;t come this far or fight this hard to settle.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When one begins creating a better life, she must often let go of what isn&#8217;t working in order to make room for what will. But beware of the first or second thing that comes along to fill the void. If you&#8217;ve studied the power of thought on your life\u2019s circumstances, you know to envision\u00a0how your\u00a0ideal&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[23,143],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2392","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-creative-process","category-decision-making"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Beware of the First Thing That Comes Along - Marnie Pehrson Kuhns<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/marniekuhns.com\/unplugged\/2014\/09\/01\/beware-of-the-first-thing-that-comes-along\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Beware of the First Thing That Comes Along - Marnie Pehrson Kuhns\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"When one begins creating a better life, she must often let go of what isn&#8217;t working in order to make room for what will. 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